A year and a half since leaving Tapestry, I'm heading back to treatment. This time, I've chosen a program closer to home (finances are a factor, so I'm participating in a partial program). This will be my fifth treatment (not including outpatient visits over the course of 6 years). Though my family is still supportive, I must wonder...do I have what it takes to recover?
Fortunately, I've been blessed with a positive attitude. I believe that health and happiness are realistic goals. I'm frustrated, but not hopeless. How do other people maintain motivation? I'd love to hear your thoughts.
Leisel
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Tapestry Alumni Support Group
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Sign in on the upper right hand corner of this screen.
Tapestry Alumni Support Group
Sundays, 4:00 - 5:00pm
Facilitated by:
Tammy Maxey
Online Support Groups:
Local Support Groups:
* THE Center Support Group
Wed 7-8pm ~ Asheville
Blogs by People Connected with Tapestry: Posted By Permission
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3 comments:
Leisel,
This year alone I have been in the hospital or treatment centers 12 times. I know where you are coming from but unfortunately I do not have an answer. I got married one month ago and I hoped that I would find that to be a motivating factor, but alas, I falling even more quickly.
If anything I hope that you know you are not alone.
Leisel - Your goals are realistic. I went back to Tapestry for a 2 week "partial" program (that's all I could afford too) about 6 months after I left the first time. My other option was to be hospitalized in a psych ward. I left feeling terrified that I wasn't ready. In fact, I cried and cried about this the day of my graduation. That scared feeling kept me symptom free for a couple of months but then I relapsed. I got involved with someone who functioned as an eating disorder sponsor even though she was from AA and not eating disordered. I committed to calling her before I purged EVERY time - even if it was just to tell her that I was going to do it anyway. I also committed to following a meal plan and "checked in" with her every night. If I didn't follow the meal plan we problem-solved ways for me to be successful the next day. Sometimes that felt like taking a step back but sometimes it was just useful information for preventing problems in the future. I have remained purge free since I started (about 3 weeks ago) and most days I've followed my meal plan. I chose to start an EDA group (AA for eating disorders) and hope to find people with enough recovery to serve as sponsors. We talked about being "buddies" at one time. The offer still stands. Call me. 804-814-0712
Change of plans...
After being literally kicked out of Ohio University, I was blessed with the opportunity to return to Tapestry. I'm terrified, but my terror confirms this is the right step. Tapestry challenges me in ways that are not always comfortable. And it's definitely time for me to redefine what it means to be comfortable. Thanks for our comments!
Leisel
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